Monday, November 27, 2006

Living in the Past

Isn't it amazing how much of life is a mater of timing? Like in a bad soap opera, you overhear the wrong part of a conversation, take it out of context, and put into a play a series of events that permanently alter your path.

It always surprises me that despite the outlandish nature of soaps, the framework is not that far off reality.

And then we spend most of our adult lives with these weird habits, beliefs and idiosyncrasies (like having to finish all the food on your plate). All instilled into us from our childhoods - where we spend most of our time complaining about this that or the other that our parents did.

Or we carry it into our jobs and our friendships, our relationships. And we have all these weird issues about what should be benign stuff.

Then we use all these mind reading tricks and assign meaning and ulterior motives to other's behaviours.

And somehow we never figure out that if we just put our assumptions aside, and talked to people, instead of trying to "figure them out" life would just flow so much more smoothly.

I guess I have noticed lately that we all seem to be living wrapped in our pasts. I noticed originally because I remember being curious about how upset people were getting about things I didn't think were that big a deal.

At first I wanted to attribute it to my maturity - but then I smartened up and got to thinking about everybody's buttons.

So, I don't know if there is anything I can do about it, but I sure hope to try not to live trapped in my past and be upfront and straightforward with others.

That being said, I know I've never brought it up before, but I've been wanting to talk to you about .......

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Final Jeopardy

I actually guessed the final Jeopardy question correctly today.
That never happens!
Mind you, so did all the contestants, so it was probably an easy one - but I got it right, and that made me smile.

That's all I have to say about that.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Ah Nostalgia!

The past couple of weeks have been a walk down memory lane in all sorts of ways.

It started with meeting my old boyfriend for drinks- which turned into dinner, and then spread into the bulk of the night a couple of Thursdays ago.

It was a good night, we played catch-up (it has been 6 years), and reminisced a little bit about our "cult of the green carpet" days.

Back in OAC year me, my pre-ex, my best friend and his best friend we sort of an inseparable foursome. We would spend every Friday night, Saturday and Sunday together. Usually one or 2 others might join us, but we were the core. Mostly we hung out in Steve's basement - which had a green carpet. Hence our cult name.

Then I bought Beverly Hills 90210 Season 1 on DVD - it came out on November 7th. I loved this show while in High School. And I have been watching episodes whenever I can. Even just the beginning of the credits brings back great memories!

Then last night I went to the Audio Adrenaline Farewell Concert (last one, they're retiring). So mix the music I started listening to like 15 years ago with going with my old church (the friends I was going with had a last minute emergency, so I hooked-up with my old church), and you have a potent memory lane mix.

I spent most of the night with my old best friend (same as above) and her now husband (the other guy from above). It was like Memory Lane overload.

interestingly, in my dinner conversation, when I talked about feeling nostalgic, he told me "well none of our relationships have stayed the same".

So I guess nostalgia or not, there is no staying in the Good Old Days, life marches forward whether you want it to or not.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

My Knitting Resolution

Ok - you can directly blame this on my friend Kevin (unbeknownst to him)- I have been reading his blog recently and he recently posted about what he calls "The November Resolution"

So thanks to Kevin I now have "The Knitting Resolution" - well I just borrowed the name form from him.

I consider myself still a fairly new knitter even though I've been doing it for about 6 years now.
I have analyzed myself (ah Physcian, heal thyself) and I figured out why I have completed very few projects. I am a results kind of girl, and when I can't see the results of my labour quickly enough, I get easily put off. Couple that with the 98% social me - while knitting is usually a solitary activity, you can see how I tend not to participate all the time.

I am continually surprised with just how social I am. Just last night, I was late for my running group, and started out alone to catch-up with them. I couldn't run more than 3 minutes at a time, I stopped to walk frequently, and I was ripping myself a new one with my negative self talk - it went something like this "you're pathetic, who did you think you were kidding, you can't run, you can barely walk for 4 minutes straight, look at you, huffing and puffing all out of breath, you've only been out a few minutes - you belong on a couch, lazy and fat forever, just accept it" It was truly awful, I don't think I've talked to myself like that before. Then I catch-up to my running group - actually they caught up to me, because they turned around halfway. And I ran the rest of the way back - we even raced for the last 6 minutes, no problem. It was like a Jeckle and Hyde experience.

Anyways, back to our regularly scheduled programming, I have this Afghan I've been working on - it's my first. I've made sweaters, scarves, hats, dishtowels, and baby booties before, but this is my first blanket.
So I started it January of 2005 - that's right 2005! Which means that this January it will be 2 years, and I'm only 1/3 of the way through.
So I decided last week that I will endeavour to work on my blanket every day, every SINGLE day until December 31st and hopefully I will be almost done by then.

So far it's been 8 days, and I've managed to work on it for 7 of them. I even brought my bundle to work today to get my quota in.

So you can call me on it - hopefully I'll have a blanket to show you in January - Hopefully.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Assumptions and presuppositions

Do you ever get frustrated while driving?
Boy do I ever! To begin with I really dislike driving in the first place. I love the freedom and independence it gives me, and I would never go without it. But usually I am driving alone, which, for social me is pretty sucky.

So I am usually just trying to hurry up and get to where ever I am going (not speeding, just in attitude). And some days it feels like every other driver on the road has been purposefully put in my path to slow me down, and muck up my timing.

I know what you're thinking - easy Egotistical there Mira - the world does not revolve around you! And you're right, the impractically of every driver just waiting for me to hit the road, then doing everything in their power to mess with me leans the balance completely away from that theory.

But sometimes, despite my most rational efforts, I can't help but feel that way.

Now here's the funny part - when I get frustrated by other drivers I mutter the make or model of their car, as if it's a bad word. So if for example you cut me off, I would probably say something like "hmmm...Camry". Then For a few minutes I have a genuine dislike of all Camrys. And I always equate the license plate with the newness of the driver. So if your plate starts with an AW or AY or AZ I just figure you're a new driver, and I can add inexperience to the litany of reasons why I don't like you. The irony, I got a new car about a year ago, and my license plate starts with an AX. I am not however a new driver - I've been driving for 12 years (can you believe it's been 12 years already!)

I wonder what other drivers think about me?

Sunday, November 05, 2006

My Inauspicious Alarm Clock

Argh!!!!!! My new alarm clock is going to drive me crazy. If you've been keeping up, you've already heard a little about my trials and tribulations with this "state of the art" device.

When we last visited this topic, We were left with scaring imagery of hundreds of little birds pecking away at my head. (I'm good with the Hyperbole eh?!)

If you remember this contraption also comes with a very detailed manual, which I need to refer to do just about anything with it.

So it wakes me up as per usual at 6:ooam on Friday morning - Ocean Waves and all. I tap the alarm button to turn it off as I do every morning. Then I figure it's off, no problem.

On Saturday I needed to be somewhere for 10am, and was cautioned not to be late. I didn't want to pull out the manual to re-program my clock, so I set my running watch alarm instead. Well my too-smart clock went off at 6:00am as usual and startled me out of bed. Then because I was scared I would fall back asleep and not get up in time for my appointment - I spent like 3 hours lying in bed, talking to myself, trying to keep myself awake and think of something I could do so early. (Yeah, I bet the crazy diagnosis is starting to sounds a little more realistic right about now.)

So for this morning, I thought I better re-set the alarm, 'cause I'm not getting up at 6am again, and I want to go to church. Since I bothered to bust out the manual, I figured I would try a different nature sound to wake-up to. I choose "Mountain Stream". The alarm went of at 8:25am, that's a good sign, but the stinking sound of trickling water for 15 minutes made me have to pee something fierce! It felt like I had just sat through a 3 hour film while guzzling an extra-large Diet Coke . As I was hobbling to the bathroom, half awake, I woke everybody else up with my "Ow, ow, ow" mumble with every step towards my pee goal.

Having survived the mental and physical ordeal that was my alarm going off and the ensuing pee, I collapsed wearily back into bed to recuperate.
Oops - 3 hours later, I roll over, it's almost noon, and I missed church.

My plans foiled again at the hands of my alarm clock. At least I'm going to choose to blame my alarm clock - much easier than taking any personal responsibility for anything ;)

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Grumble, Grumble

I need to complain!
That's my disclaimer - so turn away now if you're not in the mood for a minor rant.

I have had a crummy day - any single event would have been manageable but, it's the culmination of all of them that has pushed into this complaining mode!

Ok so let's start at the very beginning (If this were a good day, that would be the seguay into the Sound of Music song).

I got this very exciting "Progression Wake-up Alarm clock" for my birthday - not cheap and special ordered from the U.S.
The premise of this clock is that it wakes you up with simulated sunlight, aromatherapy and nature sounds. And this schmorgasboard is suppose to make you wake up naturally and easily.
I envisioned floating out of bed, fully rested and refreshed when the alarm went off.

So I set it up on Saturday, and it went off Sunday morning. The pre-set nature sound is "Songbirds" (there are 5 others). I woke-up Sunday morning thinking I was being attacked by birds at the window. Yesterday I swear I had a split-second where I thought they were pecking at my head (like a scene out of Hitchcock's The Birds).
So for this morning I reset the sound to "Ocean Waves".

Yeah, stupid alarm didn't do what it was suppose to - I hit the snooze for an hour, then spent 45 minutes in my usual sleep stupid state staring at the TV. I start work at 8am, I left the house at 8:05am.

Then, of course because I'm rushing, I get in the car, and start backing-up as I'm checking out my back window. I nearly run over my next door neighbour.
"OMG, I'm so sorry are you ok?"
"You nearly run me over"
"I am sooooooo sorry".
"It's alright", turns around, keeps walking, mumbling.
So now I'm worried about coming home to find my house TPed by my middle aged, unhappy, neighbour.

I get to work and the morning whizzes by - thankfully.
In the afternoon, I'm on a call and somehow my head is getting heavier, and heavier, my eyelids feel incredibly heavy, maybe I'll just put my head down and close my eyes for a minute - Ahhh, that's nice.
Wait a minute I'm at work, and on a call!!!
ABORT, ABORT - come on eyes OPEN! Listen to me darn it - head lift up.
Phew, that was really close!

Ok, so I finally get to go home, and I'm thinking - it's ok, I'll run tonight, I'll get pumped, have a good night's sleep and tomorrow it'll all be good.

I get ready for my run, leave the house at the usual time and - what the heck, has everybody and their brother decided to go on a leisurely drive tonight?
The streets are packed, after 20 minutes on the highway I finally have moved 1 exit, so I think "I better get off, maybe the roads are better than the highway".
Yeah, ummmmm the answer to that is no.

So 62 minutes later (yes, not the 20 minutes it usually takes me) - I arrive at the Running Room just as everyone is getting back from the run.

I get a call about 2 minutes later from my Family "Can you buy a pizza on your way home for supper?"
So I decide to get some Mamma's Pizza 'cause it's cool and gourmet, thin crust and they have a funky potato pizza (which tastes much better than it sounds).
Ok so 2 pizzas cost me $38 - That's crazy!!

Then I get home and I'm being reprimanded for spending so much money on Pizza. Ok forget the fact that they all sat home doing nothing, and that I paid for it with my own earned money, and didn't ask for any money from anyone else.
No "thank you", no "Wow! Awesome pizza, this is really different" - I got yelled at!

Ok, I'm done complaining - thanks for reading my grumblings.